Ninja Vampires, Filipina Cowgirls, Space Elf Pirates, oh my...

Elaine just got dry and wanted nothing to do with the water filling up the chamber. Her finger pointed from the collapsed hallway to the current fight and back to the water. Definitely needed to get out of here. The door with green lights looked better than the places filling up with water and the other girl would probably be just fine.

The other side of the door held far less water, but much more moral ambiguity as the clear sound of Diana drowning rang through the door. "I thought drowning was supposed to be the silent killer?"

"Apparently not. It sounds like a rat when a ship goes down."

"I'm sure it will stop after a minute or so. So where did this ship come..."

"So, we're just letting someone die within feet of ourselves even though one of us can do something about it. Not a question. Just stating what is happening."

"And interrupting. Pretty rude. Now, where..." Elaine turned her head back to the locked blast door as the sound of creeping death rattled the frame. "Well, I guess I wasn't going to ask a question." Knowing she needed to do something, and pretty much everything, Elaine stepped into action and into the watery depths of the flooded hallway. After establishing she could step through shadows underwater, Elaine promptly forgot. Struggling to find a way out, Elaine realized not being able to talk made drowning the silent killer it actually wasn't. Both booted heels tapped against each other with a gentle push, Elaine shot through the water and into the shadows, pulling herself out back in the safety of the pressurized room.

Elaine's movements intentionally or otherwise, pushed the key thing just close enough to automatically activate the door. The Enlightened One, the one on this ship, not the one in the water, being in no particular hurry, took their sweet time to open the door. Apparently they didn't realize humans needed to breathe.  As the membranous barrier opens, then...



...Diana slowly began to awake, coughing up water, her lungs filled with sweet, sweet oxygen. She looked around and realized she was standing on a white sandy beach. Neither Elaine nor any alien was in sight. But instead of clear blue skies, they get a swanky celestial sky, with all the galaxies and nebulae and other cosmic things.

"Am I dead?" Diana thought to herself.

"Not really, but you have a terrible lifestyle." A voice responded, telepathically. It was an unreal sensation, the voice echoing from inside the mind and outward.

"Cowgirl?" Diana looked around She spotted no one, but looked down and came face to face with a small, furry creature that resembled an earth corgi.  

"No, and I'm disappointed there wasn't any ninja vs. cowgirl fighting on my ship either." It said. Or thought.

"Who the heck are you?" Diana asked.

"I'm the Enlightened One, or at least that's what the crew call me... I'm one of those higher energy beings. My true form, my true intentions, heck, my true speech are so incomprehensible I have to sound snarky for your limited human brains. Still, just being able to talk to me, you've got impressive minds." The corgi sits and scratches itself with its hind leg.

"But you're just a space corgi!" Diana retorted, making herself sound stupid in the process.

"To you maybe. Usually I take the form of a deceased loved one to bring you comfort or closure, but looking around your head that's not a good idea, Mom hater. Damn... fleas..." The space corgi started gnawing on its fur.

She shifted around, looking at the sand. Diana knelt down, then propped herself down to sit. "So... what now?"

"You tell me. You helped save my ship form the knife ears-" The Space Corgi, or whatever form he'd actually take for Elaine, perhaps her racist shaman grandmother, shot a look at the Cowgirl, who was over a hundred feet away, faced with her own personal Enlightened One. "-though flooding it in the process and most of my crew are dead."

"I was here for loot. Or the Enlightened One..." Diana reflexively asked the Blood Mail to give her a dagger. She got nothing.

"I'm putting away all sharp or explosive objects for the duration of this talk, thanks. I'm feeling generous today. Ask me a question, and what would you like?"

"I want this elf mask to work for me, because I want to not drown next time I go diving. And... is my mother ever going to change?"

"Okay. here goes..." The corgi, which is now capable of flying, approaches Diana's ear to whisper.

A burst of light shot out from the back of the chamber. "I've seen brighter. I once won a starring contest with the sun." She in fact did. Read the backstory unless it hasn't been written. "I'm sure there's a lot I can teach these aliens about..."

A large figure stepped out from the light with a white tank top and a rag around his head. A dark pair of glasses hung on his face with the same color as the tattoos on his arms. "Hey girl, what you want and what's your question?"

"Awesome. If you hadn't written Back Dat Azz Up, who would have."

"Celine Dion."

"I knew Venus was lying and being stupid. She has a losing record to Seagirl."

"She's the worst girl in the sea. There aren't even seas in Australia, dumb bitch."

"For my wish, I want whatever the girl with swords wished for to not happen. Does that work?" Elaine turned to make her way towards the wall to shadow jump out of the ship before turning back to Diana. "Have fun swimming. Lates Juvenile"

The ascent to the top went by quickly. Elaine emerged back at the start of her journey and what better place to move to the middle than the end where you started. Yeah. Enlightenment.

Diana turned around a brief second to meet Elaine, who promptly leaves this mysterious 9th dimension by being herself. She felt the power draining from the mask, its life support capabilities now defunct. The Space Corgi looked at Diana and had to do Elaine's wish. "Sorry kiddo. Wish clauses and all that, so I can't have that mask work for your diving needs. But..."

Diana was sent out of the 9th Dimension and shunted back to this boring 3 dimensional plane of existence. She was right back outside the room, and was instantly drowning and crushed by deep water pressure again. The Giant Alien ship powered up despite its damage and sped towards the surface.

The currents were kind enough to wash Diana onto a beach probably near Elaine, as well as a fruit smoothie stand. Diana slowly regained consciousness for the umpteenth time, her stuff beside her, plus one item added to her... inventory.

A small plant, if it could be called that, was sticking out of Diana's lower rib cage.

The dark skinned, polynesian islanders watched in fascination as these two figures met. "Somehow I think this is your fault, Cowgirl!" She pointed to the plant on her side which had taken root into her. She assumes an ass kicking stance with her sword. "You better fix this!"