Enlightenment

Google doesn't go looking for Elaine, because it knows you don't find Elaine- Elaine finds you.

Elaine uses Pepper Spray to season her steaks.

Elaine's bullets don't travel to her targets. The universe moves her targets towards her bullets.

Elaine pointed her gun at a group of supervillains, then they died. Then Elaine pulled the trigger.

Elaine's bullets are made of the skulls of people she has roundhouse kicked.

Only one of two things goes through the minds of people fighting Elaine. Her bullets, or her boot.

When super villains want to scare each other, they tell Elaine stories.

Elaine stopped an extinction level meteor. With a revolver.

Elaine was once bitten by a king cobra. After seven agonizing days, it died.

Elaine is married to Clayton. Their threads are the awesomest thread on SHRPG.


To be updated. Elaine facts are welcome.

Elaine doesn't reload her guns, they just know better than to be empty.

[12:11:55] The Nekromonga : well that's good. I would've reported you for being OP.

[12:12:46] The Nekromonga : to make it even more stylistic, he'd be in the agency as Walker Texas Ranger

[12:13:03] Zell : They say Chuck Norris sang "I feel like a woman" and then suddenly vanished

[12:13:12] Zell : That exact moment Elaine was born

[12:13:18] Zell : Coincidence? I think not.


 (I know it's lame to quote yourself, but it's Nekrobear approved. [12:14:20] The Nekromonga : You should add that one zell.)

They say Elaine shot a bullet into space, and now Scientists keep calling it the Big Bang.

Elaine uses a night light. Because the Dark is afraid of her.

All of these actually happened.

Elaine once gazed into the abyss. It blinked.

There are 4 horsemen of the apocalypse because Elaine rides a corgi.

Elaine achieved enlightenment in a cave, without a box of scraps.

Elaine's best friend is a master thief. They stole from Carmen Sandiego.

Elaine can't die because both heaven and hell are afraid she'll take over the place.

The phrase "there's an exception to every rule" was created because Elaine kept breaking them.

Elaine went to the 9th Dimension with Diana and they met a higher being who would grant one wish and answer one question.

She wished to negate Diana's wish and found out Celine Dion would have written Back Dat Ass Up if Juvenile had not.

After being nearly maimed, drowned, drilled, burned and experimented on, all Diana got was a lousy plant.