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Island Eight
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Island Eight
So I tried my hand at making my own site, and it is very much in need of criticisms and members. If any of ya'll are interested in taking part please come.
Please.
Link Tiems
Please.
Link Tiems
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
LaughingMad- Status :
Online Offline
Quote : "Insert Quote from Character Here" or etc.
Warnings :
Number of posts : 30
Registration date : 2012-03-08
Re: Island Eight
Since you asked for criticism, I'll offer mine here. In no way are they to be taken as fact; they're really just my opinions.
I'll start of by saying that I think the premise holds some promise. An alternate earth where the mystic and supernatural from legends and myth exists next to the mundane, but where once humanity and beings of myth lived together, mankind has now subdued these creatures and put them on lockdown on designated islands by using humans with magic powers.
These same humans however, have now been imprisoned on these islands as well, considered too dangerous to remain in human society.
Sounds cool to me. It would allow for several forms of character conflict. Perhaps a wish to escape the island? Hatred for humanity, a magic human who resents the full-magical beasts? Surviving on an island infested by mythical monster and semi-deities? Could be promising.
I do see some flaws with your forum itself though, especially the rules. My main personal concern would be how powers can only be earned (and weaknesses removed) by doing battle threads. This is basically forcing people to do battles to improve their characters. This is fine if your forum is combat-oriented, in which case I wouldn't be interested at all anymore, but this way you alienate people who would prefer non-fighting rp and having powers that aren't directly aimed towards combat application.
Again, if you'd like your forum to be more of a battle royale between mythical creatures and magic humans, that's fine. Just not something I'd want to be part of.
Moving on, I'd also like to address the background world. While the main background (which I think I summarized rather well earlier) is simple and understandable and pretty neat, it doesn't seem to be very in-depth. I understand that this is to give people a lot of freedom in making their characters, but I always think giving too much freedom can be just as restricting as having a canon from an already existing work of fiction.
I'd just like it if there was more to the monster-human war, as I can see how it could have a lot more depth. Like what factions were there, how was the war organized, how exactly did it start?
And other unanswered questions such as how exactly human society looks now and how it looked during the time when man and myth still lived together.
I believe you stated that the war ended five years ago from when the rp starts (2029), but that by itself gives little insight into the state of affairs.
Again, could just be me nitpicking, but I prefer the background to be a little more fleshed out, especially when the implications of mankind having always lived together with the magical in this alternate reality are present.
That was actually it, I don't have much more to say about it. It holds some promise, but I'm personally deterred from joining because of the apparent focus on battle. I hope you've found this useful, or maybe even thought-provoking.
I'll start of by saying that I think the premise holds some promise. An alternate earth where the mystic and supernatural from legends and myth exists next to the mundane, but where once humanity and beings of myth lived together, mankind has now subdued these creatures and put them on lockdown on designated islands by using humans with magic powers.
These same humans however, have now been imprisoned on these islands as well, considered too dangerous to remain in human society.
Sounds cool to me. It would allow for several forms of character conflict. Perhaps a wish to escape the island? Hatred for humanity, a magic human who resents the full-magical beasts? Surviving on an island infested by mythical monster and semi-deities? Could be promising.
I do see some flaws with your forum itself though, especially the rules. My main personal concern would be how powers can only be earned (and weaknesses removed) by doing battle threads. This is basically forcing people to do battles to improve their characters. This is fine if your forum is combat-oriented, in which case I wouldn't be interested at all anymore, but this way you alienate people who would prefer non-fighting rp and having powers that aren't directly aimed towards combat application.
Again, if you'd like your forum to be more of a battle royale between mythical creatures and magic humans, that's fine. Just not something I'd want to be part of.
Moving on, I'd also like to address the background world. While the main background (which I think I summarized rather well earlier) is simple and understandable and pretty neat, it doesn't seem to be very in-depth. I understand that this is to give people a lot of freedom in making their characters, but I always think giving too much freedom can be just as restricting as having a canon from an already existing work of fiction.
I'd just like it if there was more to the monster-human war, as I can see how it could have a lot more depth. Like what factions were there, how was the war organized, how exactly did it start?
And other unanswered questions such as how exactly human society looks now and how it looked during the time when man and myth still lived together.
I believe you stated that the war ended five years ago from when the rp starts (2029), but that by itself gives little insight into the state of affairs.
Again, could just be me nitpicking, but I prefer the background to be a little more fleshed out, especially when the implications of mankind having always lived together with the magical in this alternate reality are present.
That was actually it, I don't have much more to say about it. It holds some promise, but I'm personally deterred from joining because of the apparent focus on battle. I hope you've found this useful, or maybe even thought-provoking.
Re: Island Eight
Thank you very much for your criticisms Jack, I will take them into account and improve the site accordingly!
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
LaughingMad- Status :
Online Offline
Quote : "Insert Quote from Character Here" or etc.
Warnings :
Number of posts : 30
Registration date : 2012-03-08
Re: Island Eight
Actually I found a small inconsistency, one that'll probably be easy to remedy. In the 'world' description, it is written that in 2012 the creatures of myth were officially discovered, and that several years later a ten-year war began after which the creatures were dumped on islands. This would work for a few years, until people began to fear magic humans as well and began to put them on the islands too. This is five years before the 'game' starts.
However, this timeline is impossible. After the discovery, there were a few years of tension until the war started. For convenience's sake, let's say the war begins in 2014. This war would last for ten bitter years, meaning that it ends with the island solution in 2024. Then several years pass again until magic humans too are sent to the islands. Again, I presume 'several' years to be at least a minimum of 2 years, so we'll say it is now 2026, which is 3 years removed from the noted date of 2029.
So even when reducing the definition of 'several years' to the bare minimum of 2 years, it still wouldn't make sense. It's not that big a problem of course, and one easily solved by shifting around some of the numbers and dates, but still. Thought I'd just point it out. If you wanna talk some more about stuff, maybe brainstorm a little you can always reach me by pm or cbox, at least the coming week. I've actually already started thinking up a character concept, but it seems a bit early for me to finalize it.
(Edit: At the risk of sounding overly critical, I'd also like to ask where the island is situated, and what climate it has. What is the wildlife and plantlife like, asides from the mythical creatures that have been dispensed there? How about basic provisions such as food? Is the food distribution managed by the humans (drop-off rations), by the village/city in the center or is it simply every man/beast/thing for him/itself? That was actually more than one question. Sorry.)
However, this timeline is impossible. After the discovery, there were a few years of tension until the war started. For convenience's sake, let's say the war begins in 2014. This war would last for ten bitter years, meaning that it ends with the island solution in 2024. Then several years pass again until magic humans too are sent to the islands. Again, I presume 'several' years to be at least a minimum of 2 years, so we'll say it is now 2026, which is 3 years removed from the noted date of 2029.
So even when reducing the definition of 'several years' to the bare minimum of 2 years, it still wouldn't make sense. It's not that big a problem of course, and one easily solved by shifting around some of the numbers and dates, but still. Thought I'd just point it out. If you wanna talk some more about stuff, maybe brainstorm a little you can always reach me by pm or cbox, at least the coming week. I've actually already started thinking up a character concept, but it seems a bit early for me to finalize it.
(Edit: At the risk of sounding overly critical, I'd also like to ask where the island is situated, and what climate it has. What is the wildlife and plantlife like, asides from the mythical creatures that have been dispensed there? How about basic provisions such as food? Is the food distribution managed by the humans (drop-off rations), by the village/city in the center or is it simply every man/beast/thing for him/itself? That was actually more than one question. Sorry.)
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