The Noodle Burglar

Real Name: Jared Ramose
Alter Ego: The Noodle Burglar
Title(s): Pasta perp
Alignment: Chaotic neutral
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Hair: Blonde
Eyes: Yellow mixed with red
Height: 7.3 boxes of pasta tall (5’4)
Weight:180 boxes of pasta



Though he doesn’t fully stand out in a crowd, the pasta perp makes sure his appearance is anything but strange. With long blonde hair, the pun of having spaghetti hair is completely lost on him. He tries to keep his wardrobe as simple as possible when he has to keep a low profile. Walking around in a white shirt, pants, and apron. Mixing in some black dress shoes and a nice toque to bring everything together in the most subtle way possible.

Keeping himself covered up when on a heist, nothing but the best heist clothes will do. He dons a full black outfit, even making sure to always wear a ski mask mixed with massive shades to keep everything covered. His look is not complete without the stolen tech gauntlets he uses to complete his heists to great success. His gauntlets may glow a strange color that gives me a strange neon look but not enough to give away his hiding spot. Last but not least, his outfit is always found to be covered in some kind of noodle. From spaghetti coming out of his eye holes or fusilli falling out of his boots when he moves.


Though he doesn’t seem like it, The Noodle Nabber is a nice guy when pasta is on the line. He can be quirky, fun, or even happy-go-lucky when he wants to. Though he mostly acts that way when talking about ramen. He doesn’t have a personality, he has a pastality.


From the day he was born, Jared knew he existed with a cause in mind. No matter how much he tried, he always found himself surrounded and pulled in by Pasta. Everywhere he went, there was always pasta. It got so bad, that he felt it almost perfect the day he fell into a barrel filled with radioactive spaghetti noodles.  Awakening many hours later, He made a horrifying discovery. His genetic code had been rewritten and his whole being altered. Nothing was remaining of the old him, all there remained was a pile of strangely colored noodles. That was, of course, before the night of the big pasta competition.

The night started off as it was expected to. Top chefs from all over the world came to compete in the biggest cooking competition in the world. The event hadn’t even started before a dark aura fell over the event. At first, many pushed the feeling aside. While many chopped it up in anticipation of the amazing food being dished and served at that very moment, the aura only worsened as the event crawled closer to its climax. As the host got up to give a speech before the feast, the room rocked with the power of thousands of earthquakes. Within seconds, The room’s air was filled with spaghetti as the noodles flew off the tables. Before anyone could react, they could only watch as it all started clumping together to make one giant spaghetti ball. Noodles flew once more as the ball exploded, the room’s occupants didn’t have enough time to get to the exits before they all drowned in milled wheat. The remains of what was once spaghetti and people shifted once more, this time coming together in the center of the room. The man who once went by Jared opened his eyes once more and could only smile at the sight before him. Reveling in his rebirth, he knew this was only the start. With a mere step and a breath of sweet vitamin-filled air, The infamous Noodle Burglar was joyfully born.

He’d been having a fantastic run with his burglary when the fear of death finally caught up with him. So many noodles were safe and unstolen, and he had to stop his end from coming any time soon. Around this time, he heard rumors of a fool running a tech shop with exactly what he needed to keep his spree going. He snuck his way down to 6th street and slipped his way to the venue he was looking for, he figured it out when he saw the giant neon Weasel on top of the building. Slipping sneakily into the building, he immediately saw his prize. A pair of metal gauntlets with a symbol of a noodle on the side of them. Slowly slipping across the wall, he could barely grab them when he heard a door open from across the room. He quickly noodled out of there and through his exits before he heard a laugh right out through the workshop. He was halfway across the rooftop and jumping off when he barely missed a voice calling out “If you needed them sooner, you could have just asked.”

The Powers

Send Noods: Jared gained the power to launch strands of noodles out of his hands at top speeds. He can use this power to tie up his rivals, capture his beloved noodles from a distance, or even travel from rooftop to rooftop.

Let me Soba up: Using his seemingly unlimited supply of noodles, he can use said noodles to craft whatever he pleases. It can be anything from a suit of noodle armor, to a blade of Capellini, or even a recreation of his favorite works of art.

Steam On: With a force most foul, he gained the ability to release a giant cloud of steam into the air. While giving those caught within it a mild steam bath. The moment it enters their longs, it starts to destroy their insides in a matter of minutes

Spice up your life: By inhaling a handful of spice before using his noodle powers, he can give them a shocking boost to its power. The more he inhales, the stronger the attack or the higher the durability of the noodle strain. As an added bonus, it also gives whatever he makes with it a spiced-up smell, allowing him to hit the do-gooders both a smack to the cut alongside a punch to their senses.

Ra-mending the future: Though only a recent addition to his arsenal, his tech gauntlets have shown themselves to be worth the price. Allowing him to aim his stream more effectively and with much more ease. It also increases his strength tenfold, allowing him to pick up and carry either enough ramen to drown the West Coast with beautiful flavor or ten tons at his limit.

The Weaknesses

Impastable standards: Though his noodle strands seem like their endless, they are in fact nowhere close. For every foot he creates with little to no rest, the strains become continuity weaker until he can shoot out nothing but a soft panini.

His own Slurpent: Though the use of his noodle creation ability truly has unlimited potential. It’s only stopped by one major flaw: The limits of the human mind. The Noodle burglar can craft anything he wants as long as he can devise how to craft it creatively and in a very noodie way.

Whipped Steam: His steam power is a great way to get rid of those who try to stop him but it also does just as much damage to the Pasta Prep himself. Though he has a small resistance to it, it only takes two minutes of exposure before he starts coughing up Linguine.

In a pepper world: Though the spices empower the Ravioli Robber, The combination of roots and flowers also weakens him simultaneously. As the spice works its way into his bloodstream, it slowly infests and attacks his cells at its very center. The more he inhales and uses, the faster his body will shut down.

Bun Cha malfunctions: The gauntlets he uses might make him much more powerful and increase his limits, he outsources their constructions and has left him limited in his use of them. This means they are much more likely to malfunction and break on him. The outsource always leaves him open to repair them, a feat he doesn’t even have the knowledge to know where to begin their repair or their upgrading.
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The Items

1. The container of spices he stores on his belt
2. His Toque which doubles as an escape plan if needed

The Fluff

1. He always smells of wet flour
2. When he walks, you can hear the faint crunch of hard pasta

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