Love Hurts: A Tube Top Production (Melody & Sam)

All over the city of Toronto, television screens were turned into a new station. One that every cable company would later claim doesn’t exist. Channel 8823-867

The bright pink curtain opened to reveal a man in a bright red sparkly suit, white undershirt, black slacks and a television for a head. His bow tie was equally as bedazzled, though in black, as his jacket. A pair of television antenna were slicked back with some sort of hair gel that must’ve been incredibly strong… might’ve been super glue actually… The TV was currently showing off a multicolored dead air screen, that seemed to warp into a curved smile. ”Hello ladies and gentlemen of Toronto! Welcome to Love Hurts! The game show where rejection doesn’t just hurt, it’s deadly.” At this point, some people would recognize what this was and attempt to turn off their televisions, only to find the remote unresponsive. Phones were also showing this new game show. In fact, every electronic screen in the city was displaying this show at the same time.

The television head shook his finger at the camera, like a parent chastising a small child. ”None of that now. This is important.” The camera panned over to what could only be described as a painfully thicc dark skinned woman with white hair and rabbit ears. ”Our lovely bachelorette for this evening is RABBIT PUNCH! A famous hero down in America. Tonight, she will make the decision that could change these young mens lives forever!” The television head displayed a woman in a black and white television show winking suggestively to the camera.

Tube Top then turned and presented the audience with 7 curtained chambers. Each one containing a different person hidden to the view of both the audience and Melody herself. Inside, were 7 men. Including the superhero called Odd. ”Tonight, the heroine will make the choice between our lovely 7 contestants, or else I’m going to murder the head of Canadian cable television, Bryan Brody!” The camera cut to a man and his family, including a pair of daughters and a lovely dog tied up backstage. “And if she fights me on this…” Tube Top glared to Melody, hiding his face from the camera. His voice became deep and demonic as his screen cut to a video of the woman he had murdered in response to her initial attempt to his person. ”She knows what will happen.

The screen changed, showing love hearts now as he looked back to the camera. ”Well Rabbit Punch, ask your first round of questions!”

It was…a strange sensation to arrive where she did. It wasn’t like Sam’s portals, not in the slightest. This was forced and sudden, while Sam’s portals felt more like you were falling or jumping, sometimes getting a bit dizzy, though after awhile you’d get used to it. Not this, this wasn’t a feeling one could easily get used to. It had her gut churn and argue against her, as if there was something…wrong or rotten about it. To summarize, there was nothing about this situation that sat well in Mel’s stomach, this had trap or villain written all over it. The problem was…who was this? And…a following problem, what was this?

The display that had followed was even stranger than the feeling that had been forced upon her. Her eyes squinted and her body winced back as a light came down onto her and her ears were assaulted by loud and boasting music. Her hands went instinctively towards and her eyes darted around, trying to find out what exactly was happening. The more she listened the more she had got the idea. This was certainly a trap put on by some sort of villain. And it was themed around a game show of sorts? The more he talked, the more Melody found herself flaring up at the villain. The implications of the show, the threats she made towards Bryan Brody, and worst of all…trying to set her up on a date? What kind of villain was this? What was to gain from all of this.

There was no telling what the implications of the game show were, if the people were really in danger, but the threat made was certainly a real one. He had…potentially, a hostage and that would mean for now perhaps all she could do was play along. She had to find some way to secure the safety of Bryan Brody and of the contestants, so maybe, if she played this right, she could get some answers or clues as to where to go from this. She had to be careful though…

She reached up her hand and bit down on her thumb, thinking as her eyes stared down at the podium. After a moment, her ears seemed to perk up. She looked to the TV Freak and glared. “…alright, I’ll play the game, but before I go on, I have a few questions for you. It’s only fair if I am gonna be playing that I get to know some stuff before getting started, right? What kind of show doesn’t let their contestants ask a few questions, right?” She would have to hope he’d buy into this, there were things she had to figure out.

Meanwhile, down below with the other contestants Sam was…well, he was very lost. The entire situation, from what he could hear, was…pretty freaking awful. A deadly game show, a hostage, and…well the idea that Melody would get paired with someone made a jealous beast in his stomach roar out, but it also made the timid, nervous side of him panic and run to hide somewhere. If he won would that mean…what would that mean? How would this go? Questions like this raced in his mind. Would he still be able to be her sidekick? Would she actually wanna…no. She wouldn’t. But what would she think if they did pair? What would happen?

He shook his head, that wasn’t important. What was important was figuring out how to get out of this or at least how to make sure everyone else was safe. He began to look around, trying to find any inkling of a clue as to what the state of the others were and if there were any means to escape or get close to whoever the host of this show was. Still, behind his curtain he would be quite limited.

The audience cheered when Melody made her statement, and the television headed TV host bent over with a belly laugh. “Alright, Rabbit Punch. You can ask any question you like!” Tube Tops adopted face of American Icon host Ryan Oceanspray grinned at her from the screen. “But first, we should meet your romantic interests!”

The camera swung over to a man with a black eye, and muscles that looked as if they could bend a railroad tie. “Contestant number one is an MMA fighter with a big heart and a lot of love to give. He runs a charity that gives puppies to blind orphans.” The man in the chair began violently thrashing. “What the hell are you talking about?!” The man screamed, before an electric buzzing could be heard and it went silent again.

The camera swung again, this time showing a bookish young man in a sweater vest and tie. “Contestant number two is a book store owner. His favorite hobbies? Falling in love all over again every morning.” The man started crying before the camera cut from him. An electric buzzing could be heard again as Tube Top went on to describe the next contestant.

“Contestant number three is a gas station attendant.” The crowd began booing, and Tube Top leaned in for a conspiratorial stage whisper with the camera. “They can’t all be winners, folks…” Tube Top laughed obnoxiously and went on. “He’s an amateur artist and draws lewd photos of superheroes for his… own… amusement.” Tube Top said and stared at the third curtain. “Well, if he wins at least he’ll be pleased.” The man was covered in acne and pock marks. Might not’ve been out of his teens yet.

This went on for a couple more guests, when finally Odd was the one featured. “Contestant Seven is a superhero.” The audience Ooh’d and Awh’d appropriately as Tube Top continued. “His portal powers make him a true threat on the battlefield, but will they help him in this game of love?”

Tube Top turned to Melody. “So! You had some questions for me, Miss Punch?” He was acting genial, but in honesty it annoyed him. Answering these questions was a waste of time.

A sigh of relief left her as she fairly got her questions. She was honestly surprised by that, but it was a gambit she was willing to take at least. She straightened back up, before leaning on her podium, giving the host of the show an apathetic sort of look. Before she could get to the questions, though, the contestants were shown one by one, her frown deepening as they went down the line. In any other situation she may have even considered some of these people, but this wasn't really a situation that warranted such ideas or interests. She couldn't let her mind wander like that anyways, she was a hero after all and there was certain responsibilities that it involved.

Something about this, though, seemed wrong. It seemed...like something was off about these people but she couldn't put her finger on what. But before she could finish that thought, Sam came up and her heart sank a bit. She had gotten him involved into this mess somehow and she couldn't help but wince at that. But no...no no...she couldn't get strung up on that just yet. She had to keep her head on straight if she gonna get everyone through this.

When the table turned to her to address Tube Top, she pointed a finger at him. "Ya said this game is deadly? What do you mean by that? I have no idea what the rules are, but ain't that a bit unfair? Shouldn't I have a chance to save people? Besides, that's more entertaining, right?" She rose a second finger at the man, her eyes narrowing carefully, seeing what else she could get out of him, "There has to be rules too, right? Every gameshow has rules or at least a contract to sign, otherwise it's not a real gameshow." She finally rose a third finger, "And third, if I get through this, besides the...'reward' do I get anything else out this? What about a chance to kick your ass?"