Results of the August 2019 Character Creation Contest

Kaliya Morvis is an ancient alien of unknown origin with a wormhole where her heart should be.



Red: 37

Inqy: 38




Red: Creativity: 10
Reasoning: This is awesome. Her story is strange, but in an intriguing sort of way. I've heard of space ladies before and even star ladies, but I haven't seen it done quite like this. From having a wormhole heart to being previously omnipotent to losing her identity, there is a surplus of uncommon ideas fused together to make a truly original character. I am very happy with what you've done.

Concept: 10
Reasoning: Might just be a sci-fi/space nerd, but I love this concept. It's mysterious and fascinating, with the potential for some major lore development. As I read it I just kept thinking of all the possibilities. What stories could this character be in? How will she grow? How will the world view her? I'm not kidding when I say this character, if used and developed enough, could become iconic. The character has all the ingredients for being a long lasting, airtight concept.

Execution: 9
Reasoning: What can I say? From the beautiful graphics creating a perfect atmosphere to sleek and understandable prose, this was a wonderful read. It really sets the mood and gets your excited for the character. It flows well, and is never boring or jarring. My only critique is that I wish there were more. The history and personality are very good, but both are pretty short. I feel like I'd have to rp with the character to get a better understanding of her, which is fine, but I still would have liked to get a bigger picture of these ideas on the app itself. Other than that, I can't imagine a better execution of this character. It's spot on.

Graphics: 3
Reasoning: The glitz! The glamour! Beautiful graphics work, as always. I would give more if I could.

Grammar: 5
Reasoning: Gonna make this look like nepotism, gurl. I skimmed the app looking for any grammatical errors (and I am very picky. That OCD), and i didn't find a single thing to get after you about. As far as I can tell, there are no mistakes that warrant the lose of a whole point in this section. Some things I may have written differently, but I will attribute that to differences in style. Looks to me like the app complies perfectly with standard English.

Inqy:  Creativity: 10
Concept: 10
Execution: 10
Graphics: 3
Grammar: 5
Ah. Yes, Kaliya. Personally, I thought Tube Top was gonna take this, no questions asked. But, then you came in and dropped this masterwork of a PC on us. And tied for 1st place. Fantastic.





Ghost Slot*
200 flat XP

Tube Top is the ultimate showman from a world where anything can happen.



Red: 37

Inqy: 38




Red: Creativity: 10
Reasoning: Not only have I never seen anything like this, but it seems almost every aspect of the character is well developed. This guy isn't just a gimmick, but an actual character. After reading I feel like I have a good idea of who he is—a unique individual..... Who happens to have a TV for a head. Well done. Seems the only person you ripped off was yourself. Very original and well thought out.

Concept: 10
Reasoning: You most likely got into the same drugs as Woof, though I guess he got a bad batch. This concept is cool. More thematic than my style, but that's alright, because you didn't forgo characterization for the sake of theme. This guy could probably be interesting no matter the concept he's attached to, and that in my opinion is the essence of a strong thematic character, or any character for that matter. All around very intriguing and strange. Well done.
Execution: 9
Reasoning: It's a pleasant app to read and to look at. From the gif background to the color choices to the powers and organization, the concept is executed with a highly precise attention to detail. I doubt I could have brought this idea to life so well. I felt like I was looking at an old, glitching TV. This app is pushing the bar in the beauty department. Seems I need to up my game...... That said, I am going to nitpick, if only because Chelle produced a similarly polished app, and the competition is razor thin between you two. There was no header at the top of the app, just an empty space and then a quote. It seemed a little odd that Tube Top's name wasn't up there. Other than that, there are empty sections that keep the app from being completely airtight and orderly. Put the name up and remove those sections, and it would be perfect.

Graphics: 3
Reasoning: Very pretty custom template. Don't need to say more.

Grammar: 5
Reasoning: Perfect English. Nothing wrong here. Nice and concise sentences that don't drag on too long, but that also aren't so short that reading is choppy.  

Inqy: Honestly, I thought this was gonna be the worst thing to come from this whole thing. I'm proud to say I was wrong. This is, without a doubt, the best PC I've seen you put together, Lars. I'm super proud of you, and I hope you keep up the amazing work.




Ghost Slot*
200 flat XP

Emoticon is a being of emotion that has taken the form of a teenage girl.



Red: 34

Inqy: 33




Red: Creativity: 9
Reasoning: Very cool concept that I'm sure took you awhile to develop. It seems fleshed out and interesting, even if I have seen the whole "powers change based on emotions" thing before. You managed to add enough of your own, unique ideas that it doesn't seem stale or unoriginal. I've honestly seen a lot of the multiple personality type characters, and they usually cause me to roll my eyes. They are just so uniform and samey most of the time. This one though? This one is good. I commend your creativity in making this your own.

Concept: 8
Reasoning: The concept is very cool. It's almost systematic, which I like. You're working with some cool stuff. A psychic entity? Pretty sweet. Has the potential for development and lore. Shifting between identities? Also has potential for drama and all that. My only issue is I couldn't really tell you what this character does. Like, what is their purpose? What are their drives? Perhaps goals can come later, but if someone asked "Oh, cool character. What does she do?" I would have trouble answering. It isn't clear whether they are heroic, villainous, aspiring, vengeful, or motivated in any other manner. Again, this can obviously change over time, and I believe that is your intention, but I'm judging the app as it is, and the character seems to be a bit aimless as it stands.
Execution: 9
Reasoning: Brilliant execution. I've never seen a newer member demonstrate this kind of artistic skill so quickly. It usually takes several months for them to even change the color of text in the template. It's a beautiful app that catches your attention and makes you want to keep reading. It's clear and organized, yet flamboyant and flashy. The only critique I have is that I had to enlarge it as an image. It would have been great if this was done with code, so I can see the pretty app without having to do anything.

Graphics: 3
Reasoning: S Tier graphics. Very cool stuff.

Grammar: 5
Reasoning: I didn't find anything that jumped out at me as incorrect. You are a very clear writer with an entertaining style.

Inqy: Creativity: 7
Concept: 10
Execution: 8
Graphics: 3
Grammar: 5
Emoticon wasn't my favorite this round. Personally, she reminded me too much of the Lantern Corps emotion beasts, since she was born of emotion. But, I like the way she was put together.




Ghost Slot*
150 flat XP

Nathan Wattson aka Natty G is the top tier knight of the Order of the Pimps, bestowed with magical jewels to use as he sees fit, and tasked with the duty of preserving the lifestyle and longevity of the immortal order.



Red: 27

Inqy: 30




Red: Creativity: 7
Reasoning: History and personality wise, this guy seems like a pretty average con-artist. Nothing about him really separates him from the pack of those types of characters. However, you've mixed a lot of tropes and common ideas into an original character that I honestly like. It took some thought, no doubt, but I've honestly seen characters with a lot of major similarities.

Concept: 8
Reasoning: Super pimp! Need I say more? That's a really cool concept. It feels very comic booky, and I think it's campy and hilarious, but also pretty cool. I can imagine a lot of different stories with this guy that would be a lot of fun. It's a great idea.

Execution: 6
Reasoning: The app organization was pretty basic, and more than anything, I feel like I didn't get a large enough picture of who this guy is. i have the basic concept and personality down, but judging from the app alone, he's pretty one dimensional. That's not to say the character is bad or that there aren't good ideas here, only that the app doesn't lay them out wholly enough for me to give it any more points in execution. Super pimp could definitely be realized a bit better.

Graphics: 2
Reasoning: Basic template with image. Nothing special, but adequate.

Grammar: 4
Reasoning: Nice and clean. No major issues that I could see, however some of the sentences felt clunky. They extended on too long in many cases, connected only by the use of the comma. It made some of them sound very unnatural. However, overall I had no issues reading it. Concise and understandable. Good job.


Inqy: Creativity: 8
Concept: 9
Execution: 8
Graphics: 2
Grammar: 3
Super Pimp. A strange character, for a strange contest. Fantastic idea. A bit campy, but, I enjoyed the read. His items seem a bit gimicky, but they do fit the theme.

 


Ghost Slot*
100 flat XP

WALDERMORT IS THE TRUE LORD OF ALL THINGS - Presumably, Waldermort



Red: 24

Inqy: 30




Red: Creativity: 7
Reasoning: ......You've stumped me. I don't know whether to laugh or cry. This app is so dumb and out of left field, it had to have some creative energy put into it, but at the same time, it's really just a satire of various ideas that are already out there. It's nothing new, really. Props for making weird shit, though. Tis the essence of creativity.

Concept: 6
Reasoning: I have no idea what drugs you were on when you came up with this, but I want some. The concept is so dumb and weird that's it's funny. I wish I knew what the hell it's trying to tell me, but even still, it's pretty amusing. I can't in good faith give a good grade, because let's face it, this "character concept" is more akin to the rantings and ravings of a crazy person, but it's at least alright at what it is... Whatever it is.

Execution: 6
Reasoning: Regardless of the content of the app, I actually think it could have been presented better. It's a joke app, sure, but the organization is all over the place, and what this thing is trying to say to me is so unclear I think I've been mind raped. Like, I know it's a parody, but I'm not sure what it's a parody of. It's hilarious, but, seriously.... I'm left scratching my head, wondering what this is and how I should treat it. It got some laughs, but even jokes can be made more clear to improve quality.

Graphics: 2
Reasoning: Basic template with an image. Here's two points.

Grammar: 3
Reasoning: Overall not too hard to read, but there are a decent amount of spelling and syntax errors, as well as what I assume to be typos.

Inqy: Creativity: 10
Concept: 10
Execution: 5
Graphics: 2
Grammar: 3
I don't even know where to start with this one. I can't even look at him without breaking into a fit of giggles. Woof, seriously, you need to take longer than an hour on these things. You could sweep it every time if you did, you dork.

 


50 flat XP

Sludgelord is the product of a failed super soldier experiment, this slimy so and so has crawled onto the scene looking for revenge.



Red: 29

Inqy: 23




   Red: Creativity: 6
Reasoning: First off, the personality is pretty basic. I would have liked to see at least two paragraphs. Being a hothead, doing whatever you want, and being driven by revenge are pretty common traits as far as fiction goes. I really didn't feel like I understood a unique and interesting character after reading the section, even if the potential is there.

Secondly, the history seems to be a variation of a longstanding "super soldier experiment" trope in comics. You even reference this a little by saying "instead of giving him super strength," as if it's a common thing. Using this type of story isn't necessarily all that bad, but there isn't much beyond it. I will give props for him escaping and wanting to take revenge on the people that subjected him to the experiments, though. That's a bit more uncommon, though I have seen it before.

All around, I think you could do something cool with a character with this history and personality as a base, but it doesn't really jump out at me as especially creative.
Concept: 7
Reasoning: This is definitely the strongest area. I think the actual concept of a super soldier gone wrong is kinda cool, especially since it's a goo man. The concept hits me in my love for sci-fi. It's weird and kinda horrific, but that's what makes it awesome. I think you have a solid foundation here. A little bit more polish and some more unique ideas would have made the concept even better, though.

Execution: 5
Reasoning: This honestly wasn't really fun to read. There are lots of empty sections which break the flow, and the ideas your working with just aren't laid out as thoroughly as they could be. As I mentioned in the concept, it could be cool, even if it's just chaining together very common ideas, however I really don't think it's communicated in it's best possible form in this app. I say you go back to this concept, develop it a bit, and put a bit more effort into making a complete app. You would be doing everyone a favor by bringing what could be a very cool character to the site.

Graphics: 1
Reasoning: The app was just a basic template, with no face claims or other images.

Grammar: 3
Reasoning: Generally pretty clean prose, but I noticed a comma splice, a misplaced semicolon, and a typo that made a sentence's syntax incoherent.

Inqy: Creativity: 7
Concept: 10
Execution: 3
Graphics: 1
Grammar: 3
I enjoyed the concept a lot, but the execution could have used some work. I understand that this is your first try at this, and I hope you continue to work on it. Personally, I can't wait to see the next PC you come up with.





50 flat XP

*A ghost slot is a character slot that you gain temporarily to allow one more character to your roster. Once you choose to retire a character, you lose that slot. You do not gain a permanent character slot.