Argr Bjørnson, The Gay Asgardian He-man

by **Humanity** September 22nd 2017, 10:18 pm

Argr Bjørnson
"Heeeeeeeeeey girl! I hear we gonna save the world."

Basic Biography

Real Name:

Argr Bjørnson

Renegade/Villain Name:

The Social Justice Viking

Title:

fuðflogi

Alignment:

Gay Neutral

, "The Ass-gardian

Age:

I can't count that high

Gender:

I am a male

Race:

Homosexual Asgardian

Hair:

Brown with rainbow tips

Eyes:

Ocean Blue

Height:

6-foot 10-inches

Weight:

It changes

Blood type:

Sparkling rainbows

The Looks

He has two different forms that you might see him as. The first is his most ommon apperance.

Spoiler:

The next picture is when he taps into his inner power of the bifrost rainbow.

Spoiler:

Alignment Justification

I am gay, and I have no real care for your laws or culture. I just want to ~~drink appletini's and dance~~ and ~~suck~~ cut off the heads of evil.

The Legacy

Personality:

An amazing sense of fashion and horribly sensetive to rude or distasteful comments. Not very well adjusted as he transforms into a gay macho-man randy savage in a wolf loincloth and a viking demenor. It's like looking at your own "Rainbow Hulk".

History:

Asgardian child, son of Bjørn. He is a large disappointment to chieften Bjorn and ultimately was sent to Midgard to live in secrecy. However upon reaching Midgard, Argr soon came to realize that this realm of Yggdrasil sucked. It sucked more than he did, which wasn't a lot because there are pretty much no other gays in Asgard. Argr's abilities didn't manifest untiul he went into a Las Vegas roadside conveninece store and bought a back of skittles. While eating these rainbow colored sweets, lightning struck the store and his inner Asgardian powers awoke. In triumph he was ripped from Midgard and landed upon the Bifrost bridge where he looked to Heimdal when he spoke the most important words he had ever spoken.

"Taste the rainbow, bitch!"

However, Argr realized that he had transformed, his body was much more muscular and he was far more powerful than when he was last in Asgard. Argr was then welcomed to Asgard and not regarded with the same loathing and distain that he had previously been regarded with, as no one realized that he was the same person they had just tried to sweep off to Midgard just decades ago.

Argr would come to realize that by eating skittles and calling out for others to "Taste the Rainbow" he could draw upon the powers of the rainbow bridge and transform himself into the great Asgardian warrior refered to only as "The Rainbow Viking."

The Powers

"Taste The Rainbow, Bitch":
Simply by ingesting skittles and calling out "Taste the rainbow!" Argr enters a He-man like transformation which allows him to become "The Rainbow Viking" where he has enchanced strength, speed and durability akin to the strongest of Asgardian warriors.

Hypno-Eyes: If you've ever seen the Jungle Book, you know how the snake hypnotizes people with their eyes. Well, Argr has the ability to do the same thing, except his eyes glow rainbow and only succeed in hypnotizing homosexuals.

Increased Capacity: Argr is an expert of getting things to fit. He can cram twice as much stuff as most people could, which makes him a very coveted man. Argr is able to fit more into his inventory and fit more into packages in a tidy and neat manner, making him an excellent UPS man. What did you think I was talking about? Mind out of the gutter.

Social Justice Viking: It's like a Social Justice Warrior, except it involves killing people whom are considered biggots or unkind to their fellow man. When opposing an enemy in the name of equality or on the grounds that they are being totally mean and unreasonable, "The Rainbow Viking" has all his abilities augmented so that he has greater strength than giants, he can withstand the coldest winters and his skin is as hard as Titanium. He can run at the speed of a cheeta and he has the ability to call forth rainbows to strike his opponent. The raimbows don't do damage, but they are very likely to annow someone who doesn't like gay people...especially when he pretends that they "caught his condition".

The Weaknesses

Crime against fashion: He feels compelled to solve everything the way a viking does. This includes a lot of violence. If someone has trangressed against the laws of fashion, Argr is forced to attack them with everything he's got.

My body may or may not be ready: Without skittles, Argr is just a basic bitch who got basic bitch levels of sass.

Mysterious Identity: Argr must not let anyone know that he becomes The Rainbow Viking, otherwise they'll never let him back into Asgard, even under that personna.

Rage: Argr has anger management issues. When people make him mad he goes to his room and squeezes his stuffed animals until he cries and inevitably settles down with a tub of Ben&Jerry's on the couch while watching Teen Wolf or Sex In The City.

World of Wonder: Everything in Midgard seems to fascinate Argr. Especially Television and music. They can be very distracting, and even force him to break out into sporadic dance.

The Mechanics

Super Gay: He cannot be affected by any mind control that will cause him to take action to compromise his connection to the Gayness

The Arsenal

Whorenir:A rainbow hammer that manipulates and fires out rainbows. Can be called to an individual, and can only be held by gays.Weaknesses: Can be called by LGBT character. The hammer demands virgin sacrifices. Not virgins as in people, Virgins as in like "A virgin Strawberry Daquri".

Spoiler:

Physical Priority
1: Endurance - Like a Champ.
2: Reaction - Knows what to do.
3: Strength - Holds his own.
4: Agility - Not too quick.

by **Night Walker** September 22nd 2017, 10:24 pm

Oh my god, Zell.

Argr Bjørnson, The Gay Asgardian He-man

Argr Bjørnson, The Gay Asgardian He-man

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